Food drink
Simply to let you understand, if you purchase something featured here, Mashable may earn an affiliate commission.

Image: mashable photo composite.
By Leah Stodart Mashable Shopping
Have you ever seen a kitchen area gadget questioned, “Why is this so randy?”
You are not alone, our gutter-minded pal.
In some cases, these products can’t assist however be formed the method they are. Citrus reamers require to be tapered and immersion mixers need to spin like a vibrator to mash up food. We’re uncertain why a microwave cleaner needs to look like it’s cost Spencer’s in the mall, but alright.
Either way, Amazon has a lot of these items for sale that we simply could not neglect it anymore. You may get an odd look from complete strangers when you bust out one of these in public, but you can assure any observer that you’re not really purchasing a butt plug in public– it’s simply a strawberry stem cleaner that looks like a butt plug.
( Note: Please don’t really utilize any of these as sex toys. Because sharp things.)
Food drink
A strawberry stem eliminator that’s simply a spiky butt plug
Image: chef’ n.
Spiky Butt Plug will be the important things that keeps you up at night. Despite it really being red and green like a real strawberry, it truly simply looks like an anal device for someone who likes daiquiris.
Food drink
A citrus reamer that might be used in … multiple methods
Image: swissmar.
Is it an extra-pointy vibrator? Is it an XL butt plug? Neither! It’s a citrus reamer that is utilized to eliminate seeds from persistent fruits like oranges and pomegranates. The entire “double headed” design makes it look additional pleasant.
Food drink
A corn stripper that appears like a (unpleasant) cock ring
Image: chef’ n.
Possibly the promotional pictures are what do this item dirty, but it’s tough to unsee. The primary distinction here is that cock rings are implied to stimulate enjoyment while this corn stripper has stainless-steel blades around the inside. Do not get them blended.
Food drink
Rubber finger guards that look a little too promoting
Image: clairla.
Chopping, clipping coupons, or supergluing that set of damaged glasses will go far more smoothly when you’re not stressed over nipping your fingers. Regrettably, the rubber material and tiny spikes make these finger guards appear like a foreplay toy from hell.
Food drink
An immersion mixer that looks much like a wand vibrator
Image: proctor silex.
You know those massage wands that are advertised as spinning shoulder massagers, however everyone knows they’re truly vibrators? They did not require to make this immersion mixer look like that. The unclear listing is also spot-on: “Ergonomic grip for simple handling” and “extra-long 5-foot cord” could easily be about mixing food or solo play.
Food drink
Meat-shredding claws that would absolutely leave scratch marks
Image: bear paw items.
Okay, these look a little extreme to be sex toys. But then once again, there are a lot of pleasurable toys that look unpleasant upon first glimpse, and some individuals are into having their back clawed up.
Food drink
An egg yolk extractor that will perform foreplay
Image: quirky.
Sex toys have actually seen some significant modernization over the past couple of years. Oral sex simulators are round-ish toys with holes at the end to send air and suction to the clit. This egg yolk separator wishes it could be that cool. (For recommendation on these toys, go here)
Food drink
A Salt Pod that’s likewise about to perform foreplay (but bigger)
Image: fusionbrands.
If you never ever knew that salt mills might appear like this, you ‘d have believed it was simply an additional large clit stimulator for increased arousal.
Food drink
A dual-sided spatula that truthfully looks useless in the kitchen
Image: roca.
Nobody has actually ever requested for a spatula with an ice cream scoop on the other end, which is most likely why this dual-sided tool simply looks like a slender, purple dildo.
Food drink
A Karate Lettuce Chopper that’s really into BDSM
Image: gamago.
A lot of people purchase this lettuce chopper as a gag present for someone who enjoys karate. Nevertheless, if your mind remains in the rain gutter, this chopper appears like it’s straight out of a porno where someone seduces and spanks the chef.
Food drink
Reusable food covers that might pass as anal beads
Image: blend brand names.
The neon colors? The variable sizes? The only way you ‘d understand that these rubber recyclable food covers weren’t supposed to enter a butt is due to the fact that they’re not attached to each other.
Food drink
A bag sealant that resembles a portable USB vibrator
Image: colorgo.
The ability to re-seal a chip bag without utilizing a clip is really hella practical. This device just occurs to suit your hand much like a mini vibrator would and has a button that looks like it controls intensity settings. Go awf.
Food drink
A kitchen dusters that looks best for role play
Image: kitchen area Home.
How these comically fluffy dusters are taken seriously is one of the world’s greatest mysteries. Toss a rainbow one in a leather bag with a pair of handcuffs and a gag, and you have actually got yourself a chains kit.
Food drink
Scrubbing gloves that appear like penis-masturbating gloves
Image: cleaneasy.
Why that finger position? Why? Spiky rubber gloves that are implied to masturbate penises really do exist, however they’re generally scarier-looking than this.
Food drink
A microwave-cleaning volcano that appears like it just climaxed
Image: souqu.
Ah, the grande ending. This volcano, which would look much less horny if the lava was lava-colored, makes cleaning up the inside of the microwave enjoyable by spouting cleansing solution.
Is it hot in here?